Every Strong Person Has A Story
It is said that you only really live when life throws you a blow or when you have had to learn to be a strong person. Adversity is a powerful source of knowledge.
However, it is important to know that happiness and moments of well-being are times when we are willing to learn more. During these times we discover exactly which factors reveal who we really are. Plus, we discover what things are worth fighting for.
That said, one thing remains clear and that is that everyone is guided by a roadmap of experiences. We all carry our own baggage, which others cannot see, but which is really there. This baggage is full of dark moments, light moments and tears.
This is a burden that we will always carry on our shoulders. However, this burden makes us strong and wise, even though we know that sometimes wisdom comes with pain. In this article, we invite you to think about this for a moment and discover why every strong person has a story.
You were born to be a strong person: find out why
This may be hard to believe, but as humans we are generally much stronger than we seem. The reason for this is very simple: our brains are programmed to survive. Our genetic code equips us with the predisposition to learn from adversity.
In a way, this explains why it’s so hard to be happy. For our brains, being happy just isn’t useful. And yet it is the state of being that we all long for and hope to achieve.
A strong person’s secret to survival is to be able to respond to danger, threats, or loss. Happiness can only be achieved when we are able to beat the storm. Throughout history, people have managed to move forward, overcoming and overcoming obstacles and difficulties.
In essence, this is the knowledge that really matters. This is the knowledge that enables us to achieve a real sense of well-being. We are born stronger than we think. However, often we are not aware of this at all.
Your personal story: the shell of a traumatic childhood
Behind every (strong) person is usually one or two traumatic events. These can be losses, emotional defeat, disappointment, or a violation of us.
- If we had to go through these kinds of things during our childhood, these experiences will always stay with us.
- After all, a child does not have the proper psychological tools needed to overcome adversity and this ensures that these kinds of experiences have serious consequences for the development of a child. These kinds of experiences can then even influence the personality of this child.
- However, neurologist and psychiatrist Boris Cyrulnik explains that a traumatic childhood does not necessarily mean that the rest of our lives will be traumatic as well. We have to find a way to face events like this.
- We can get over it. This child must be able to count on support and help from outside. With this support and help, this child will see the world from a different perspective, with certainty and confidence.
- We don’t forget the pain, we just learn to live with it. This is something we need to remember.
We all deserve love. We all deserve to be happy again.
The resilience and strength you have in you
The word resilience can be used to describe a particular physical characteristic. It refers to materials that change or are able to return to their original form even after destructive forces have been applied to them.
Within psychology, resilience doesn’t quite refer to the same thing. When we as humans experience a personal trauma, we will never be like before.
- However, ‘not being the same’ does not mean that we are no longer able to be happy or balanced.
- Someone who is different from before is also stronger than before.
- Within psychology, resilience refers to this process. Our brains are programmed to overcome adversity.
- We want to move forward. We want to live and learn from fear and difficulties so that we can move forward.
But why doesn’t this always work? This can be explained by three factors:
- Our upbringing and our genes.
- The social context we live in.
- We don’t have the right psychological strategies.
We develop resilience
Some people naturally know how to face difficulties in life. Maybe their parents were able to set the perfect example or maybe these people just naturally know how to look at things more gently.
Fortunately, for everyone else, resilience can also be developed. For example, there are three sentences that you can say to yourself every day to develop strength. These sentences are really very helpful:
- I am able to overcome difficulties, have values, self-confidence, behave well and there are enough people who love me.
- I am a person who believes in hope and who has confidence in himself.
- Solving problems, communicating, defending myself, building good relationships and fighting for my own happiness is what defines me.
These are three simple thoughts that can help you reshape your own brain so that you can develop certain virtues. These are virtues like strength, courage, and the indispensable pillar that helps us get through life: resilience.
